Sunday, November 2, 2014

When you are sad...pushing people away isn't the answer

Today someone who is very sad and who is hurting over a bitter loss in her life, unfriended me. While Facebook isn't the only way we are connected of course, it shows how very upset she is.

This person is angry and broken hearted, so much so that now I've been blocked from contacting her. I'm sorry for her grief and pain - and I'm saddened that her best choice seems to be to cut people out of her life. Isn't it ironic that when we are feeling the worst, sometimes our first choice is to lash out at those around us? Such a sad twist of fate that pushing away the few people who really actually cared and were there, by your side for so long, seems to be an option. I'm grieving tonight for not only myself - because I do feel very badly that this is how things are - but for her, since if she continues this way she will have no one left.

Maybe sometimes the way to get past sadness and loss is to be angry and get it out of your system. Sometimes it helps you heal and move past the grief in your life. I don't say this because I am upset. ...I say it because I lost something I cared very much about after 19 years and realize that when you get angry sometimes it helps you to move forward. But sometimes, turning away from those who DO care is not the answer. You need people who understand and still love and support you no matter what. Shutting us out won't help you heal. 

I'm feeling empty tonight, that this is the path she choose. How can you invest so much of yourself in someone else's journey only to be kicked aside when they can't even see the value in true friendship....

"Life on Delmarva" • #delmarvausa