Coping With Christmas: Reflections on Evolving, Personal Growth and Finding Joy

"One Week Until Christmas: I Feel Like I'm in a Blender of Year-End-Meets-Holiday-Chaos"

I'm stunned, shocked and appalled; although I've been diligently counting down the days until each major holiday - starting with Halloween - the actual number of weeks and hours simply must have escaped my brain's narrow window of comprehension. I mean really(!); it's one thing to say "Christmas is just 47 days away".....and a completely different thing to realize "it will be here any MINUTE NOW." And that's where I am....wrestling with the reality that just 16 days remain in this time span we call 2022. 😆

It's not that I have anything against the holiday season. I used to hate it with a passion, but at the time, life consisted of toxic and negative people - ones I should have shown to the door much sooner. Back then, Christmas was a black hole of worry and feeling as if everything I did was wrong; it wasn't joyful, peaceful, or kind, however, when you're IN a crappy situation like that, you don't always see the toxic levels of stress you are going through. You just....exist. Until one day, the despair that blanketed this time of the year with dread, began to fade, and I finally realized just how I'd been living.

    

Until that time, all I knew was worry and stress during holidays, a time frame filled with expectations and demands I'd allowed to take over my life. Things didn't become better overnight; once the fog rolled back and the usual traditions were no longer required, it felt like I'd fallen into an emotional canyon of missing the past. I felt lost while realizing there had never been a holiday season without anxiety and dread. It took a few years to process that what I'd come to expect was not normal, and to accept that now, the power to reassess my environment was actually, up to me. I grieved for what had been - unable to morph quickly into my own version of the holidays (what did I like to do? Would our own family make new traditions and special moments?) and yes, the process of discovering my own happiness was a tough one.

Finally, I realized my enjoyment of the season could be whatever it wanted to be; for the first time, I felt happy over small things such as the bell ringers outside a grocery store, Christmas carols on the radio; the scent of pine needles without feeling guilty for failing to put up a tree. We learned to celebrate and share joy in different ways, but without the exhausting expectations and demands which had always been present. I even wrote a blog post about coping with and surviving the holidays, which probably mirrored pieces of my own journey and discovering what worked and what didn't, as I swore I'd never force anyone into a rigid, miserable way of life just to make "things perfect".

    

    

Finding the sparkle in twinkling lights, soaking up the warm fuzziness of special moments; learning to make new, happy memories....is a gift many of us put off for far too long. We stay where we are, miserable to please someone or because "that's that way it's always been", when in reality we are dying inside.

  

I hope you've already moved past that stage of struggling to be what others demand or tell you is necessary. Maybe you've been there and found your way out of the darkness already, and if you did, you'll probably understand this post. Wherever you are in life, I hope you remember to grab the moments of giggles, laughter and smiles, enjoy breaking the old rules, and creating your new adventures that nurture heartwarming moments in your life. Nothing is set in stone and how we each find our peace, light and joy, is ultimately something each of must discover for ourselves.

Wishing you a beautiful week ahead. It's almost Christmas, you know! 🎄Thanks for stopping by my blog. 💕

community first • marketing consultant • advocate for small business • lover

of classic cars • beach girl • believer that "together we accomplish more"